Trinity - Butts Across America Smile

Trinity Tri Hawks
September 22, 2012
Blake 3 Trinity 0

Mako's photography

Brief Overview: Today we headed out to who the heck knows where to play a little soccer (if you know what I mean) ;). The weather was chilly and the wind was a pain but the sun was shining so we endured. But now on to what you really care about, what anybody really cares about in life, the quality of the bench. 

Color: The bench was your standard silver metal, nothing too impressive. However, there were some major flaws that the bench had on the left side that brought its rating way down. 

As you can see, there is a weird red stain that takes over a good eighth of the bench. Some members of our team described the color as "what happens when you get a bloody nose in the middle of the night and the blood completely dries up and then when you wake up in the morning you have dry blood all over your face." Well, I concur. First impression of the bench, not very good. This category gets a 4 out 10.

 

Comfort: I would explain what our reaction was to the bench but you should be able to tell from the picture above seeing as a picture is worth 1000 words. Well, if your an idiot then you wouldn't be able to tell that we LOVED THIS BENCH!!!!!  You were able to let your back sink into the back support and let it absorb all of your worries. It was a little small for my 6"3' stature, but nothing too unbearable. The metal wasn't cold so nobodies balls were in harm of shrinkage. Overall great on the comfort level. 9 out of 10 

Playing Time: I didn't get any playing time this game, which was "most dope"seeing as I was loving the bench. However, one of the bench squad (Christo) got in and scored two dirty goals. For this reason Playing Time gets a 10 out of 10.

Friends Made: We made a friend this game in the form of the opposing team's mascot. We aren't sure if he was a kangaroo or some kind of polar bear. The one misfortune was that we didn't get his name so we can't friend him on Facebook. If anyone knows who he is, please let us know. 8 out of 10 in this category.

Overall: This Bench receives a final score of 9 out of 10. (The highest overall all grade yet)

Until Next Time,
NMM